Love Is…

“Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth.” 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

Sometimes I sit and try to think back to a moment I knew for certain I was loved. One of my favorite moments happened a few months ago. I was having a really low day, on a day that shouldn’t have been low, and I felt myself needing to cry. Not wanting to put a damper on anyone else’s mood, I hid myself away, in the dark, and just cried. I stayed away from everyone and everything and just let the depressed mood I was feeling run its course. And then I heard voices. No, not in my head, these voices were real and I knew them well. These voices belonged to my nieces. They had come to find me. I had disappeared, and they missed me. They saw my tears and asked me what was wrong and all I could bear to say to two of my favorite little people was that I was just sad. The little one climbed into my lap and just hugged me. I was overwhelmed with the showing of love from her that I hugged her back and it did start to make me feel better. What is Love? An act of kindness from a dear friend, a genuine hug from a loved one, an utterance of the words from someone we desperately want to hear say them; no matter the situation, we all love and need to be loved.

Love is one of the most powerful emotions we have. It is special because it’s not just an emotion, but an action. It can change the way we act, the way we think, and the way we move through life. It makes the difference in how we treat others and what kind of treatment we accept. But what IS Love? That question has troubled many on more than one occasion. Why? Because Love can be so many different things. The bible outlines it for us rather well. Love is patient, kind, not envious or boastful or proud. It’s not rude, self-seeking, easily angered, or keeping track of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth. And I’ve paraphrased here, but the sentiment is the same. Love is complex, yet simple. It’s multifaceted, yet all encompassing. Love is…

What is Love? I’m sure you’ll be asking yourself for the rest of the day, or maybe longer, trying to answer a question that is almost impossible to answer. It looks one way one day, and another the next. For my nieces, its hugs and sleepovers and Disney movies, and for my friends it’s kind words and a cashapp when funds are low with a simple “shut up” in the memo line. Love is sunshine on a dark day. Love is the leftovers still being in the fridge when you’re ready to pack your lunch. Love is a “thinking of you” text. Love is taking the day off to sleep, a momcation, a visit to the doctor’s office. Love is writing a living will, just in case. Love is leaps and bounds, security and vulnerability. Love is…

So how do we find our way? How do we navigate love with there being so much to it? For me, I’ve found the best way is to just let it be, but to be careful with it. Love is not the emotion you want running wild on it’s own through life. Love needs partners like Caution, Optimism, Curiosity, and even Nervousness, so that it doesn’t send me running head first into a situation that I shouldn’t be in. Love feels great, but it can be blinding. How often have we been in a relationship and made choices that we regret later, all because we were in love? We tolerate harsh words and mistreatment because we know a person loves us and doesn’t mean to hurt us. We do things for some we wouldn’t do for others out of love and then end up not setting the best boundaries at times. All for Love. Love can make us careless.

Don’t get me wrong, Love is absolutely wonderful! It feels great and it’s a special gift that we give to others. It’s one of God’s most precious gifts to us. “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16) It doesn’t get much sweeter than that. But God also has boundaries with us. He has things He will not accept and that He does not tolerate from us, and there are consequences for falling out of His will. There’s nothing saying we can’t do the same. Being in God’s perfect will sometimes means not being in the will of others. It means disappointing people we didn’t set out to disappoint, or taking back our power so that God’s love for us can be felt. God allows us to discover and decide what Love is, and what Love isn’t, because at the end of it all He is at the center of it. “… for God is Love.” (1 John 4:8)

So what is Love? Some may feel that I’ve wasted their time with this entry, because there’s no definitive answer to the question. There’s no overly profound way of dealing with the greatest feeling of all time. At the end of the day, Love is choices. And the choices we make when it comes to this emotion will help guide us through almost every action we take. I have made this choice: Love God, Love others, Love self. I can’t really go wrong with that.