Everyone Makes Mistakes

“We are made right with God by placing our faith in Jesus Christ. And this is true for everyone who believes, no matter who they are. For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. Yet God, in his grace, freely makes us right in his sight. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins.” Romans 3:22-24

I recall a time when I was giving my all to a friendship. I loved this person, endlessly, and wanted them to be a part of most aspects of my life. I had introduced them to my friends, my family, spent countless hours on the phone with them, hanging out with them. I’d spend money on gifts, and trips, whatever it took to show them the extent of my friendship towards them. But then I remember when all that ended. I don’t know what exactly happened to cause our relationship to fall as far apart as it did, but it was clear that it was over. That we could never have it back again.

Then I would reflect. I reflected on all the things I could have done that had made me the bad friend. The one who deserved to be betrayed. Was I the one who said snarky things behind their back? Did I ask them to do things they didn’t want to do? Did I pressure them into being my friend? And then I remember feeling guilty. I felt guilty for not seeing that I was being used by them, for not recognizing the signs that they were never really my friend. I felt guilty for allowing them to become so embedded into my life that family was asking about them, friends were asking about them. And no matter what I did, I couldn’t escape the memories or reminders of what had been. I asked myself this then, and I still ask myself this now… what was my mistake? Did I mess up during the friendship to the point of no return? Or was I wrong for allowing the relationship in the first place?

I know we all find ourselves asking questions like these at some point or another in our lives. Sometimes we ask about the relationships we enter. Other times about the jobs we’ve taken, or the move we made to the other side of the country. We’ve even asked ourselves this when we support a cause we haven’t researched fully or defend a person we don’t know as well as we think we do. Is it possible to even live life without feelings of Guilt or regret? Is it possible to get through life without making any mistakes? When you look at the words written in front of you it probably feels like a silly question. Of course it’s not possible to never make an error or a bad judgement call. There will always be times when you think something is the right move, and then it just isn’t.

Then there are the big ones. Those life shattering, world ending mistakes we make. At least, that’s how they feel at the time that we’re making them. Sometimes we say something we regret to someone we love, or invest in something we’ve been advised against. We might wait too long to start a long overdue project, or eat the whole pizza instead of just a few slices. There will be times when we make a decision despite the consequences and just as surely as we live to tell about it, there’s a possibility that we live to regret it. And if we regret it, that means we feel guilty about it. How do we survive this? How do we get past the mistakes we didn’t mean to make, and the mistakes we didn’t care about making until it was too late?

First, we have to remember, that nobody’s perfect. We all mess up from time to time. It’s human nature to live a life of trial and error. If you can give yourself permission to be human and to make those mistakes, recovering from them will be that much easier. Second, be remorseful. When we’re truly sorry for the mistakes we’ve made, it makes it easier to keep living life. Third, and final, keep moving forward. The worst way to deal with guilt is to keep sitting in it and not doing something about it. Guilt is not a punishment, but a marker for correction. It’s your mind’s way of telling you that you know it was wrong and to do something about it. God knows he made us imperfect creatures. He knew when each and everyone of us were born the mistakes we would make, but he also knew the people we would become because of them. He knew the stories we’d be able to tell and the lessons we could help others learn because of the mistakes he allowed us to make. If we learn to embrace our mistakes and work towards correction we can activate that grace that He’s given us.

Everyone makes mistakes. How many times have we heard this when we apologize for some wrong we commit? How many times have we said it to someone else when they are faced with an error they made? When we live this life that God has given us, we fail at being perfect in it every single time. The bible tells us we’ve all sinned and fallen short of God’s perfect will. And He forgives us for it every time. “We are made right with God by placing our faith in Jesus Christ. And this is true for everyone who believes, no matter who they are. For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. Yet God, in his grace, freely makes us right in his sight. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins.” Romans 3:22-24 According to this, all we have to do is believe. I believe, and I hope you will, too.