I AM RECOVERY

“But all who devour you will be devoured, and all your enemies will be sent into exile. All who plunder you will be plundered, and all who attack you will be attacked. I will give you back your health and heal your wounds,” says the Lord. “For you are called an outcast— ‘Zion for whom no one cares.’” Jeremiah 30: 16-17

I don’t have to be okay today to be on my way to healing.

Merry Christmas! First, I hope that you are well and with people you love and who love you this day as we remember and celebrate the first greatest gift God gave to us. But if you’re not, and maybe today is just too hard to spend with others because of whatever hurt you’re feeling, I hope you can find some peace in my words for you today. I know I said it before, but this holiday season has been so rough for me. I’ve really been missing my forever people, who life showed me just how short forever can actually be. That hurts so much. But what hurts even more is feeling like an outcast in this world. Feeling like no one cares and no one will be there in the end, feelings I fight daily. And I hate fighting them on days like today… but I do. And that’s ok, because recovery is a process not a moment. And irrational thoughts, though they creep in when they want and how they want, don’t have more power over me than I have over them.

But what are irrational thoughts for some, are not as irrational for others. Some of you all really do have people who should love you that don’t. People who are plotting your demise and wishing ill of you. And that makes some days harder than others, and it really sucks when those days are today. And its on days like today that it feels like you just won’t ever recover or things will never get better, or like you don’t deserve to come out from under this dark cloud. I’m here to remind you of who you are and whose you are and to encourage you to seek light in this darkness. Come on, let’s affirm.

Affirmation #1: YOU are the light. Darkness is the absence of light. That means, any source of light can penetrate it because it’s not something that can overcome light. It can only exist when light is not there. That means when things seem their most overwhelming and nothing else is there to lean on, YOU can provide the source of power that diminishes the hold darkness can have. YOU are your own power source when all else fails. It lies within.

Affirmation #2: Today is just one day. One day will not ever fully define who you are. Ever. It doesn’t matter how great or how awful the day might be, the days that came before it got you to that point, and the days that come after it will either propel you forward or hold you back. But each day is just one step in your recovery process, in your healing from hurt, and one bad day won’t break you anymore than one good day will sustain you. So survive today, and know that yesterday played it’s role and tomorrow will do the same… and you get to decide what that role will be.

Affirmation #3: God provides restitution. The Bible is full of stories about people and places that were up against the worst of possible odds and God pulled them out of it. For some, it was almost instantaneous, but for many (I dare say most) it was a process. Days, weeks, months, years of persecution, ridicule, bondage, pain, despair before they realized the fullness of who God was for them and how He could carry them out. And I know that seems cruel, like why make them wait when You have the power to restore them instantly. I don’t have a true answer for that, only my best interpretation and that is that sometimes we have more to learn and just like with recovery, lessons don’t always happen overnight… and that’s okay. What I want you to take from this is that God ALWAYS comes through and when He does, it’s ALWAYS in the way we need it most… to heal and restore us.

My friends, as this year draws to a close, I hope you can find hope and light within and propel it forward for all to see. I hope that your healing is progressive and you are gaining it little by little in a way that will eventually sustain you. And I hope that you are keeping God close to your heart, even when it feels hard to do, because He cares and He’s always there ready and often waiting for us to be ready for what He has in store for us. I love you, and as always, I’m rooting for you. Keep conquering daily!