“We will not hide these truths from our children; we will tell the next generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord, about his power and his mighty wonders.” Psalm 78:4
Telling my story helps me and helps others.
I have a confession… I’m a bit of a conundrum. I often find myself being misunderstood because I don’t do everything the same way; it depends on the circumstances. And those circumstances don’t always make sense to other people. Here’s an example. Ever since I was a little girl I’ve struggled to eat savory and sweet things in the same dish. My mother would make Sunday morning breakfast: Eggs, grits, sausage, orange juice and buttered toast with grape jelly… only there was always a piece of toast that had no butter. Because I couldn’t eat salted butter or margarine and jelly on my toast. That has followed me all my life, even as my palette has become more sophisticated, and there are still certain dishes I can’t and won’t eat (I may be the only person alive who won’t butter her pancakes, waffles or toast before adding syrup, jams or jellies to them). And this is just one of the little idiosyncrasies that makes me who I am… a bigger one? I’m an open book with forbidden chapters. I speak very freely and openly about myself and my story… except for some parts I cling very tightly to my chest.
Are you like that? Do you have things that you’ve been through that you just can’t bring yourself to talk about or to share? Are there things you have endured and overcome that you don’t tell others about because telling them gives people the ability to judge you and to hurt you? Are you pretending to be vulnerable to avoid the pains of true vulnerability? I bet that one hurt a bit… pretending. It’s hurting me now to even write it down… because I’m guilty, too. Because as much as I want to be truly open and vulnerable, there are areas of my life where I’m just not ready. And that’s ok. It’s ok to be a work in progress. And I’m here to encourage you to be a little more vulnerable with your story, because it’s healthy and healing to tell you testimonies.
Embracing your testimony. That obstacle you overcame that has strengthened your walk today. That thing that broke you down like you’ve never been broken, yet you’re figuring out how to put yourself back together. That situation that forever changed you and made you who you are. The stories you’re afraid to tell other people because you don’t want them to look at you differently. These stories are the chapters in our books of life and for some reason we’re embarrassed by them instead of proud of them. Society has taught us to hide our truths instead of broadcasting them because the court of popular opinion is cruel. But what if I told you that there is a power behind sharing your story? What if I told you that you can heal with it? How? Let’s affirm.
Affirmation 1: All stories are meant to be told. There is not a single story out there that doesn’t have the potential to empower and educate. Every single one. We can learn from others successes and struggles but not if we don’t know them. History is full of the stories of men and women and how their choices have changed the course of history for good or bad… your story is no less significant.
Affirmation 2: Telling your story makes it real. Sometimes when we think about what we’ve been through, it can feel like an alternate reality. Like there’s no way it could have happened. And when we push that down or ignore it, we lose a part of ourselves. Learning to be comfortable with our stories gives us control over them. That’s right, our stories don’t control us, no matter how much they may try to. Nothing that has happened in your past has the power to dictate where you ultimately end up in the future.
Affirmation 3: the test is for you, the testimony is for others. As you’re learning to embrace your struggle and success stories, maybe you can take a little comfort in knowing that your stories can help other people. When I’m talking to my clients and describing a panic attack I got through, or a childhood hurt, or a dating frustration the look of relief on their face that they aren’t alone and someone else gets it is a comfort to the chance I took on being vulnerable with them. And of course in these settings I’m not dishing like I would with a friend, but in a way that just lets my clients know they aren’t the only one with that chapter in their story.
Beloveds. I know that vulnerability is scary and difficult, and the idea of telling people things about you can be debilitating… but it can reward you as well. You can find your tribe, by connecting with others who have similar experiences. You can free yourself of whatever guilt you’re holding onto for having that experience. You can bring hope into the world, just by telling your story. And nevermind anyone who doesn’t gain from knowing you better by learning your story. This act of vulnerability has nothing to do with them. It’s all about taking charge of your own storytelling and growing into the best version of yourself. You deserve that. I love you, and I’m always rooting for you. Keep conquering daily!
EMBRACING EMOTION: THE BLOG 